Picking yourself up after a setback and having the will to keeping going takes tenacity. It demands grit.
Where do you find it?
Where do you go to when you need to dig deep, shoulder the load and move forward?
You see, even though it may be tempting to search for answers and wrack your brain for clues, a quest for answers may make it worse. What if your analysis of the past is thinly disguised self sabotage?
What if you’re berating yourself for past mistakes and, instead of taking action, you’re worrying? You worry about worry. You worry about worrying about worry. Worry becomes a cycle, a pattern that keeps you inactive. Every solution seems like another mistake in the making. Sometimes, a desperate attempt to find answers only leads to more problems. Worrying about weaknesses creates a frantic ‘patch the hole’ exercise. The problem deepens. You try to plug the gap, only to find a fresh leak somewhere else.
It doesn’t have to be like this.
You can tell a different story. You can change the reality of NOW. You can re-focus your thoughts and face the problem by turning to look at the outcome.
What is it you want?
What do you yearn for?
You see, often a solution starts with a different set of question.
To find grit and develop tenacity, focus on what you are good at and devote attention to the destination. What do you want? Why do you want it? How can you use what you have in your hands right now, to move in that direction?
The aim is to determine what you want so you can figure out where you want to go. This is a strategy that takes responsibility for now and focuses on action, rather than worrying about weakness. What you need is a system that reaches for an outcome rather than looping and procrastinating through endless scenarios to find reasons for past failures. Concentrating on what went wrong may send you down a path you’ve traveled before.
Perhaps an analogy will help.
Imagine driving a car on wet Friday evening. It is windy and the rain lashes the road in wet sheets. A dog crosses your vision. You slam on the brakes. You slide. The car skids toward toward an embankment. Desperate to regain control you wrench the wheel. What does your head do?
Where are you looking? Where’s your focus?
If you’re looking at the embankment, that’s probably the direction you’ll go. However, if you focus on the road, looking where you want the car to go, maybe you’ll stay on track.
What’s the purpose of this story?
Like the golfer who needs to look at the green and the basketballer who needs to look at the hoop, this story illustrates, what we focus on is where we’ll go.
So, I challenge you to stop worrying about what has happened and start focusing on the desired outcome. Look at the solution rather than worrying about the problem. Of course, you need to be aware of potential hazards. However, once you’ve identified them, plot the path around, over and through them. Move toward your goal, move with purpose, use your strengths.
What’ll keep you going?
Knowing why. Knowing where you’re going, knowing what you’ll achieve by going there and valuing it. This is up to you. Tenacity, grit and determination builds internally.
It you want to start now, try this quick exercise.
Grab a pen and piece of paper – and yes I know, you could simply tap it in your phone, but for the sake of this exercise try the physical sensation of putting pen to paper. As you write, think about the words and how each letter combines in harmony to create a meaningful utterance – a word. Be entirely focused in the now, in the feel of the pen, the texture of the paper and how the two meet under just the right amount of pressure to collaborate. Answer these questions,
- What do you want?
- Why do you want it?
- How can you use what you have in your hands right now, to move in that direction?
Now start moving. Use what you have within reach and do something. Take a action toward your destination.
Find Grit, Develop Tenacity. Focus on your talents and step into your strengths.
Learn how to unlock your innate talent using the Clifton Strength Finder. Develop the relaxation and mindfulness habits that allow you to manage your mind. If you’d like to know more about improving your communication skills or gaining a greater awareness of your innate patterns of thought, feeling and behaviour. Contact Nicole today.
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