Is This MyStory

Be the author of your own life

Choose to Be The Author of Your Life

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Be Mindful of Study

April 15, 2013 By Nicole Feledy

How often do you find your attention wandering? Do you sit in class, gazing out the window? Do you find yourself contemplating the posters on the walls or staring mindlessly into empty space? What if I said you can use this habit to your advantage? 

 

 Daniel Goleman recently wrote about distraction in the workplace. I suggest  you read his article here, it explains why diversions and “partial attention”  hamper your ability to achieve. Goleman also provides a simple exercise to  help you concentrate. 

 

 Even though Goleman is talking about the working world, it’s easy to see  the same problems occurring inside the classroom. It is even easier to recognise the benefits of being attentive in class. This is a skill that can be transferred. In other words, being mindful is a skill students learn in school that has direct implication for success outside school. 

Regular readers will know I am a passionate believer in the power of meditation and mindfulness. The more you understand about yourself, your motivations, your emotions and the thoughts beneath them, the greater opportunities you provide yourself. Becoming aware of the stories within, gives you the chance to choose the stories you want to live, rather than allowing others to make the choices for you. 

This is equally true from a study perspective. When you manage your mind (note: I did not say ‘control your mind’), you place yourself in a position to control your study. You make the choices. This power brings a sense of freedom, this freedom generates creativity.

How?

Why?

Because you feel in control of your learning. You know you are responsible for the outcome. This means the rewards are also yours. 

However, choosing a mindful path is not always easy. Like any skill it requires persistence and practice. Those starting out need support – which is why schools are perfectly placed to help. Although many schools are beginning to realise the benefits of meditation and mindfulness, we need more schools to embrace the concept of wellness and thoughtful study practices. Meditation is not just a monk sitting on a mound – just as a teacher is no longer a sage on the stage. Meditation and mindfulness may be used to gain access to our own resources, to use our own mind to become flexible, confident learners.

Workshops such as  MyStory Mind can help you recognise the link between self esteem, problem solving, creative focus and mindful study. If your would like to know more about how to introduce mindful study to your life (or classroom) please contact me – nicole@isthismystory.com.au 

So, how can use the habit of mindlessly staring out the window to your advantage? Redirect your focus, pay attention to your breath, train your mind to focus. Try Goleman’s exercise. Who knows you may just find yourself more becoming attentive. 

 

Welcome to a World of Expression

 

Similar Posts: Meditation; a Breath Away From Balance, Be Mindful of Expression, Within Without & Below the Story, Learning, Stories and Mindset

 

If you enjoyed reading this post you may like to subscribe to our newsletter or read Nicole’s book, Is This MyStory (available in full or part of a four part series).

 

Filed Under: Learning, Study Tips Tagged With: be mindful of study, increase your ability to concentrate, mindful study, mindfulness and school

Be the Author of Your Story

March 10, 2013 By Nicole Feledy

The day has finally arrived. Is This MyStory began as a dream, morphed into a tangible idea, was born in print and has now grown into a series of interactive seminars and workshops. This means you can join a course that will guide you towards becoming the author of your own life rather than being a character in someone else’s.

 

Put simply, Is This MyStory workshops help  frustrated teenagers find their voice. We help teenagers feel good about who they are.  The difference between Is This MyStory and other personal development or study skills courses is that we help teenagers understand the link between learning and self-esteem. Is This MyStory helps young adults develop self confidence and improve their literacy skills.

 

How often have you read a book, attended a workshop or listened to a speaker who inspired change, only to discover within a few months, you had returned to old habits? You may have attended a study skills class or revision lecture which helped initially, but then soon found your motivation waning.

Did you ask why?

The thing is, learning is a progressive experience. One step leads to another and, just as we walk in order to reach a particular destination, learning needs to lead somewhere. The key is recognising where. Many study skills, motivational or relaxation courses offer insight into new ways of thinking but they are ‘one off’ or short lived. Even though the learning is empowering at the time, it is not embedded into long term thought processes or behavioural patterns.

That is why Is This MyStory courses are embedded into everyday life. Is This MyStory workshops and seminars show students how to recognise the learning within life’s stories. We link critical, emotional and creative literacy skills to a generative project that encourages students to develop a critical, reflective and imaginative approach to life.  Students complete a learning rite. This is a literal and figurative journey, down a rabbit hole, along a learning path, toward a World of Expression. It is here students recognise their own voice and learn how to communicate effectively (with themselves and with others). This generates confidence.

The inspiring feature of an Is This MyStory project is that it is real and ongoing. Once students have gathered the tools of critical, emotional and creative literacy, they have in their possession the imaginative attributes required to manage their future. They have the capacity to work independently and collaboratively. They are able to develop their own MyStory – a focused awareness that nestles comfortably within a larger social and emotional network. In choosing to ‘write my own story’ students choose to become lifelong learners who have the confidence, courage, creativity and compassion to take responsibility for themselves.

At the moment we offer interactive workshops and seminars throughout the Northern Beaches and North Shore. We will expand to other areas of Sydney as the year progresses. If your teenager is frustrated by a world that doesn’t seem to listen, if they are a sensitive, creative individual who feels as though they need to hide their feelings or, if they simply believe they can’t be themselves, perhaps they need a new story. A story they own. We can help teenagers develop the critical, emotional and creative literacy skills they need to write their own story – both literally and figuratively.

If you would like to know more please have a look at our Interactive Seminars & Workshop page. You may even like to contact Nicole to discuss your situation.

Welcome to a World of Expression

 

 

If you enjoyed reading this post you may like to subscribe to our newsletter or read Nicole’s book, Is This MyStory (available in full or as a four part series)

Filed Under: Blog, Learning, Self Esteem, Study Tips Tagged With: be the author of your own life, courses for teen self esteem northern beaches, develop literacy skills, help frustrated teens find their voice, literacy courses northern beaches, teen personal development northern beaches, teenage stress northern beaches

Ready To Sit Your Exams?

October 7, 2012 By Nicole Feledy

Take a break and strike a pose – what thoughts come to mind when you read this phrase? Perhaps, if you are a child of the late 80s or 90s, you imagine Kit Kats and Maddona. However, if you are a 2012 HSC student, this may be the sweet tip you have been waiting for.

The first exam study tip is remember to take a break. A recent study by Dewar et. el. has shown taking a ten minute break can help you remember. According to these researchers, a brief rest allows the brain time to process what it has learnt making information easier to recall. Of course the key is to actually take a break – not to focus on something else. This is not the time to update your facebook status, rather this is an opportunity to take a moment, breath gently, relax easily and be in the moment. So, when you are studying, a useful strategy is to revise for 50 min then take a 10 minute break to consolidate what you have learnt – you may  like to try a focused breathing or meditation exercise.

The second tip is an ‘on the day’ exam strategy using the ideas shared by Amy Cuddy on a recent TED video. Cuddy explains how body language not only affects how others see us, but also how we perceive ourself. She refers to studies that demonstrate why ‘striking a power pose’ for 2 minutes (e.g. standing tall with your arms outstretched in a V position) can increase your confidence and decrease your stress. However, Cuddy cautions this is an ‘alone’ activity conducted to improve your emotions – it is not a power play to fool others, nor is it a group ‘psyc up’ session. She suggests going somewhere quiet and holding a power body position for 2 minutes.  If you have the time, you may like to watch the video – you can skip the first 10 minutes if you want to get straight to the parts which discuss how physiology can affect psychology.  Perhaps this strategy can help you settle pre-exam nerves – you could even practice the strategy by using it before a study session.

Remember, if you are in the grip of examination revision, keep the days and the study in perspective. Your exams are an opportunity to show what you know. You will have many opportunities to demonstrate you have learnt, the HSC is simply one of them.

Welcome to a world of Expression.

Filed Under: Blog, Study Tips Tagged With: exam tips, HSC study, ready to sit exams

Authentic Fears and Year 11 Exams

September 16, 2012 By Nicole Feledy

As year 12 faces ‘those’ exams and year 11 approaches the challenge of year 12, both year groups may experience fear. Although fear is an emotion associated with a possible outcome and may be described as false evidence appearing real, there are times when the potential threat is genuine. How do you identify which is which?

One strategy is to look into the fear (rather than turning away) to discover the thought pattern beneath. The next step is recognising the problem and applying reasoning skills to uncover a solution. In many cases, even if the fear doesn’t disappear, it will shrink. The Buffy the Vampire Slayer episode ‘Fear Itself’, offers an entertaining illustration of this concept. The characters learn sometimes it pays to read instructions carefully because threats may not be quite what you expect.

These were the thoughts whirring in my head during a recent conversation with my 17 year old son. He was in the grip of year 11 exam preparation and decided to focus on his future. He soon found himself struggling under the weight of perceived year 12 expectations. My son identified two dominate fears; passing year 12 English and completing his Design and Technology major work. Thankfully, he wanted to talk the problem through. He was willing to explore his inner worlds and expose the thought patterns underneath. Our conversation then turned to possible solutions. The magical outcome of this approach was the opportunity to address a more immediate, yet to be acknowledged fear; a fear of the year 11 exams.

You see, my son had chosen to fear something in the distant future, something he felt as could run from (his initial solution was to drop year 12) rather than facing a more pressing fear. He had unconsciously decided to avoid the threat of year 11 exams. Yet this menace was the most pertinent; it was already in front of him and he felt powerless to do anything about it. He could not run away. So this undefined fear gnawed away at him causing dis-ease. Even though he knew strategies to settle pre-exam nerves, at this point he was finding them difficult to apply. Why?

One answer is a lack of clear direction. My son could not identify an authentic reason for sitting the exams. They were a ‘test’ without a recognisable benefit (unlike a football semi-final which leads to a grand-final).  In his mind year 12 promised more anxiety, so passing year 11 exams would only lead to more stressful situations. It seemed pointless.  Yet, after chatting through the reasons for studying year 12 and addressing concerns about the year 12 English and Design and Technology courses, my son was able to acknowledge his fear of the year 11 exams. He faced it, determined a study strategy and, although still nervous, was able to see a way forward and apply relaxation techniques.

This post has already become a little longer than I intended, however you may be wanting a few more details  as to how my son addressed his fear of year 12 English and year 12 Design and Technology.

First, he faced his fear of English by recognising how to target specific texts by embarking upon a focused study plan. He also remembered he has a strong network of family and friends who will support him whenever he feels  ‘out of his depth’.

He overcame his fear of producing a Design and Technology major work after a brain storming session of possible and exciting product ideas. The anxiety became anticipation when, drawing upon the activities that are consuming my life at the moment, he realised he could apply real world technology to generate interest and funds for his project, post school.

Have you heard of crowd source funding? Crowd source funding refers to the practice of attracting people (crowds) to help fund a project. People pledge money, often in return for beta versions of products, donations on their behalf, or launch party tickets. This money is used to turn a creative idea into a product or service. Crowd funding is also used for charitable events. There are many internet sites devoted to this activity such as Kickstarter and Indiegogo in America or Pozible in Australia.

Although these sites may not be directly applicable to a year 12 student designing a major work, they offered my son a taste of what was possible with a little creative thinking. He could see that activities and lessons completed within school, may reach beyond the school gate. In that moment, school became a step on the path of lifelong learning and his fears, whilst real, had an authentic context. Here they could be examined, explained and eliminated.

Welcome to a World of Expression

Filed Under: Blog, Study Tips Tagged With: Fear of exams, fear of year 11 exams, overcomming exam fear

Searching for an Ah Ha Moment

July 17, 2012 By Nicole Feledy

Searching for an ah ha moment?  Try walking outside or washing your hands. Have you ever stopped to wonder where a particular thought came from? Can you recall a time when you experienced one of those beautiful ‘ah ha’ moments, a situation where answers seem to slide with synchronistic ease into an easily recognisable pattern? What were you doing at the time?

 Many of my dazzling ‘ah ha’ moments arrive when I am in the bathroom surrounded by water. It doesn’t seem to matter if my whole body  is submerged (in the shower) or if I am simply running water over my hands, either way, the physical experience of water upon skin seems to provide a ‘free time’ moment where my mind can play. These times of respite are extremely valuable because they enable creative endeavours. An example may help illustrate the point.

Recently a colleague and I were working on a project. She is a highly professional, organised and efficient teacher. I am a story teller who delights in creating something tangible from the intangible.  Together, we were destined to form a productive team. However, our best collaborative work was achieved, separately. Rather than solving problems during meetings, our ah ha moments occurred afterwards. At the conclusion of each meeting we opened the door, went to our respective staff rooms and then to the bathroom before going to class (teachers tend to maintain rigorous schedules). Much to our amusement, we both experienced flashes of insight while in this ‘wash phase’ of our respective schedules. Afterwards, in some sort of serendipitous twist of fate, we ‘bumped’ into each other on the way to class. Whilst in transit, we eagerly swapped fresh strategies. This pattern repeated itself on three separate occassions and despite a slightly unconventional collaborative effort, our project was successful with minimal fuss and only an hour and a half of actual ‘meeting’ time.

Now, I realise it may not be practical to wash each time a problem deposits a sticky mass on your hands. Similarly, close proximity to water may not be everyone’s ‘ah ha’ catalyst. However, it is possible to utilise the underlying theory to inspire your own ah ha moment. Put simply, having a shower or washing your hands may cleanse the mind as much as the body. These physical experiences provide the space to be mindful since the action of washing offers a break from the endless chatter of your self-talk. This gap allows a place for new ideas to form because you are mindfully aware of your actions, rather than over deliberating the thoughts that preceded them. In other words, short ‘non-thought moments’ or ‘self chatter pauses’, offer time to experience a mental ‘refresh’.

These ‘mental refresh’ moments have been studied by many – you may like to view this clip where Dr Adam Fraser explains the concepts of The Third Space. Another intriguing example may be found in Dr Karl’s Great Moments in Science – Can walking through a doorway make you forget? During this episode, Dr Karl provides a reason for room to room forgetfulness. He refers to the event-horizon model to suggest our brain processes information in single units and that the aspect on which we we are concentrating, gains the most attention. However, walking through a doorway moves us from one environment into another, and this may cause a memory lapse. This memory lapse, according to Dr Karl, occurs because our brain recognises the need to be attentive to potential threats in the new environment.

So, next time you find yourself over-thinking a problem, perhaps you could try walking out of the room, leaving the old solutions behind. Remember the ‘magic moment’ is the space ‘in-between’. This is the moment you pause your self-talk and allow yourself to hear those intuitive whispers. Perhaps then you will receive your own fresh, ah ha moment.

Welcome to a World of Expression.

Filed Under: Blog, Study Tips Tagged With: ah ha moment, ah ha moments, welcome to a world of expression

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Nicole Shares Leadership Talents

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Is This MyStory – Guided Meditation

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