Is This MyStory

Be the author of your own life

Choose to Be The Author of Your Life

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Be the Author of your Own Life

September 2, 2012 By Nicole Feledy

Why do authors create stories? When I ask a class this question, the first reply is usually a smiling gem – “to make money”. Returning the grin, I ask for more options. The next response, “to entertain”, is usually accompanied by the self-satisfied look of a rote learnt answer. Thankfully, after these ideas have been exhausted, someone (sensing I am looking for more) adds “maybe they want to teach us something”. Then a collective groan rises from a well of ‘here we go again’.

Unfortunately, too many students finish school believing the novels set by their English teacher were a chore to be endured. I have lost count of the number of times adults have said, “I hated reading when I was at school, but when I left and chose my own books, I discovered reading could be fun”.  Within this mindset, potential learning is frequently lost. The question becomes, how do we address the problem? Should teachers choose books which are more interesting or relevant to teen readers (is it even possible to choose a book which will universally appeal to everyone in the class?) or should we be encouraging students to identify the value of reading, even when the story seems ‘boring’.

I tend to believe the latter. It has been my experience that students want to learn how to uncover the personal message each story has for each reader. This is how we build connections. Stories offer ‘us’ the opportunity to escape the constraints of real situations and explore an endless array of possible options. Reading offers ‘me’ the opportunity to travel in a state of objective awareness and play with the conflicting ideas that cross my path. This is how we learn – we learn about environments, we learn about relationships and we learn about motivations. At the most personal level, when we reflect upon our reactions to characters and events, when we question why we feel empathetic, antagonistic or even indifferent, we learn more about ourself.

Of course, reading also provides a platform for learning how to convey ideas in an eloquent, sophisticated and cohesive manner.  Unfortunately, since the acquisition of these skills is easier to validate and ‘test’, English classes may descend into a ‘how the story is told’ tunnel and leave students feeling as though language evaluation, identity of themes and literary appreciation is  an examination fueled, end point. Yet as we know, reading offers so much more. The ‘how the story is told’ tunnel, is simply a passage to a more brightly lit chamber. If a reader continues past the ‘what I need for the exam’ point, to the ‘how I can apply what I have learnt to different situations’ path, they are more likely to perceive reading as a relevant life skill. From here, it is possible to recognise reading as an endless map. Holders of this map have a tool for choosing the direction of their life. In other words, they may apply the skills they have learnt about evaluating someone else’s story, to challenge preconceived perceptions about their own.

Therefore, reading other peoples stories (even if they do not seem ‘interesting’) can teach us how to direct, or ‘write’ our own.  In other words, we do not have to stay within the ‘how the story was told’ tunnel, we can continue forward to the ‘how I learn’ path. This is the author’s rite; you can choose to be the author of your own life, rather than being a character in someone else’s.

Welcome to the World of Expression.

Filed Under: Blog, Reading Tagged With: be the author of your own life rather than a character in someone else's, why do authors create stories

Learning, Stories and Mindset

July 8, 2012 By Nicole Feledy

It felt like hitting the jackpot. Nestled within the pages of Saturday’s paper were two glittering gems; an article about the positive impact of sports psychology and an article about the positive impact of stories.

 

  Bang, pop, sparkle!

  There they were.

  The theories underpinning my work; learning, stories and mindset, closely       allied. 

 

 Now I know these ideas are well documented and that they’ve been supported by vast tomes of  research. I also know they’ve been mentioned in popular media before, but to find them side by side in the Sydney Morning Herald seemed a powerful portent. Then, as to confirm intuition, a friend’s facebook post gave further reason to smile – an image of a young girl carrying a poster saying “Children need to be taught how to think, not what to think”.

My heart cart wheeled with childlike exuberance. 

Is This MyStory was validated in triplicate today.

Perhaps I should take a couple of steps back to explain. My book, Is This MyStory gathers these three concepts; learning to learn, gaining greater awareness through narrative and using strategies for targeted mindfulness, then bundles them together in a practical framework. Quite literally, I believe we can develop empathy and self awareness through the mindful appreciation of stories.

An aware state of mind allows us to simultaneously drift into those ah ha moments while still being actively, in the present. This I believe, is one of the greatest gifts of meditation. Meditation provides the mind training and intellectual space to really listen, feel and see. Or, to phrase it in a more personal  way, meditation helped me separate the voice of intuition from the chatter of self talk. 

Is This MyStory aims to promote creative and critical literacy. It helps young people develop their own voice. I believe when young people feel as though they have a voice, and are encouraged to use it, they begin to understand learning is a personal journey undertaken for its intrinsic value. Or to put it simply, young people learn it is their choice to learn. To date, my research has been based on what I have read and what I have observed in the classroom. I have not established control groups nor codified data. However, those who have spent time in more formal research pursuits confirm what my reality shows – learning, stories and mindset are closely allied.

So, to circle back to the beginning – this synchronistic appearance of two articles and a photo may suggest that society will soon (if not already) recognise why learning institutions need to change.

Schools need to offer students the opportunity to learn how to relax, how to show empathy, how to be flexible and how to develop creative problem solving skills. Some of the strategies we can use to achieve this are mindfulness, meditation and storytelling.

 

Welcome to a World of Expression.  

 

P.S If you are interested, these are the articles I was refering to;

1) ‘All Psyched Up’ , Amanda Hooton, The Good Weekend, SMH 7/7/2012 

2) ‘Character Building’, Megan Johnston, Spectrum, SMH 7/7/2012

 

Filed Under: Blog, Reading, Self Esteem Tagged With: learning stories and mindset

A Good Book is Hard to Put Down

November 2, 2011 By Nicole Feledy

Sometimes I am scared to pick up a book. I worry that once I open it, I will become lost. The dishes will not get done, the washing will languish dejectedly in the corner and dinner, well let’s just say we will be lucky to find enough bread to make peanut butter sandwiches.

I know that once I pick up a good book, it is nearly impossible to put it down. Although I sometimes wonder if this habit signals an obsessive nature, what I can say with certainty is, I love reading and, if I have a good book in my hand, I want to read and read and read until it is finished.

Does that mean I have low will power?  

I do feel guilty. I cringe when I see the house in disarray and a ‘to do list’ which reaches gleefully toward the horizon. But, I cheerfully let it all slide for the opportunity to spend a few stolen hours curled on lounge, or wrapped in bed, utterly immersed in an alternate space. The kids roll their eyes, the phone is ignored and only the most extreme call of nature is answered. I am elsewhere.

And yet, I am in the moment. I am mindfully placed, completely focused on the task at hand. I am also aware. I realise that in choosing to pick up that particular book I am choosing to put everything on hold until I resurface. So, I choose my reading time and material carefully. I call it reading responsibly.

There are books which can be easily read in bite sized moments. For me, these are generally nonfiction, topic based tomes. In particular I like to read motivational or innovative anecdotes and theories, particularly in the morning. These types of books inspire me to think actively as I reflect upon what I read. Newspapers, journals (on or offline) and blogs may also provide fodder reading. Then there are the stories which are interesting rather than being intriguing. These are the books which can be picked up and put down as needs arise.

Thankfully I recognise which is which. I recognise my obsession with stories and accept that I must time my reading so that I fulfil my responsibilities while still meeting my desires. I delay gratification, waiting until I know I have a day for the book. My book is patient. It knows it will have my full attention… later. For now I give my complete attention to the people and tasks at hand. Mindfulness.

Why have I written his post? Why do you think?

As any student who has sat in my classes knows, I generally answer a question with a question so that you may search inside yourself for an answer that resonates with you. I have accepted that I am obsessive when it comes to reading particular books. I have been able to do this because I have taken the time to get to know myself and my motivations. What do you know about yourself?

Can you see how knowing who you are and can help you maximise your strengths and minimise your weaknesses?

Reading makes me stronger. It enhances my creativity, offers time to simultaneously relax and reboot my mind, and it proffers joy. Although it may seem as though I momentarily turn into a lazy, antisocial and selfish individual, I resurface as a relaxed, motivated and compassionate person. I simply need to get the timing right and read when it is appropriate to read. I have the choice to be responsible for my own actions.

How can you use your knowledge of yourself to make responsible choices?

Filed Under: Reading Tagged With: A good book is hard to put down, make responsible choices, reading responsibly

Reading Stimulates the Mind and Soothes the inner Self

January 10, 2011 By Nicole Feledy

Reading is an important activity which stimulates the mind and soothes the inner self. It has the power to transport us to hidden worlds, fascinating spaces and mysterious realms. Reading offers insights into the minds and hearts of others, proving fresh perspectives, inspiring ideas and soothing relief. This is why we read. We read to learn, to experience, to grow, to break free and simply to rest within the pages.

Is what we read important? Yes of course it is. Just as overindulging in junk food plays havoc with our digestive system, overindulging in ‘junk’ reading material plays havoc with our mind. Now here I do need to be a little more specific. When I say ‘junk’, I am not necessarily referring to poorly written pieces or trashy novels; rather I am referring to texts which wallow in hopelessness, tragedy and misfortune. The front page of a newspaper is often a good example. Again I need to qualify my ideas. Certainly I am not talking about all news papers, all the time. In fact I believe reading the paper is a great way to keep in touch with the local community and the wider world. Personally I love the tangible quality of newspapers. They are part of my weekend morning ritual. I eat breakfast, read the paper and contemplate life. The key is to read the articles critically and balance them with other material that offers ‘more’.  So to return to the ‘junk food’ analogy, it is simply a matter of balancing your diet to promote health habits.

This is why I often suggest to my students to read the weekend paper. Specifically I ask them to read the ‘News Review’ section of the Sydney Morning Herald. Many of the articles in this section of the paper have the potential to act as stimulus material for the mind – particularly when you don’t agree with the stand the journalist has taken! Importantly the articles in this section generally offer examples of critical analysis or reflective writing. Therefore they offer a style of writing which can be useful for students struggling to produce written responses that demonstrate their own opinion, rather than simply regurgitating information gleaned from google.  

I guess this is probably also a good time to remind you how important breakfast is. Eating breakfast provides ‘fuel’ for your body and offers the energy you need to start the day from a position of strength. Similarly, committing to a morning ritual which involves reading stimulating material has the potential to establish a powerful framework for the rest of your day. Therefore, throughout the working week, I like to read development style texts (be they personal or professional) or books about inspirational people and events. I find reading material that is positive, instructional and inspiring establishes a constructive mindset which energises my day and encourages creativity.  

What will you read tomorrow morning?

Related articles
  • What Do You Do with The Kid Who Won’t Read? (socyberty.com)
  • Making the Most of Ritual (isthismystory.com)
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Filed Under: Reading Tagged With: Reading Stimulates the Mind and Soothes your inner Self, why we read

Reading for Love and Literature

May 25, 2010 By Nicole Feledy

Do you read what you love, do your read because you love Literature? Is it the form and structure which gains your attention or the skilful manipulation of prose to create harmony, is it the dissention that encourages you, or the awe that inspires?

Or, do you read for a more interactive social experience. Do the characters become friends who lead you on a journey of self discovery?

 Is it a little of both?

I have recently realised my approach to literature definitely leans more toward a humanist approach. I love books, rather than loving literature. I love to share in the world of others. Of course I appreciate the value of a well turned phrase, but I wonder at the delight of an artfully created character who shares their emotions. I read to be entertained, to escape the physical reality around me and to appreciate lives other than my own. I read to discover the world beyond.

 Why do you read?

Filed Under: Reading

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Nicole Shares Leadership Talents

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Is This MyStory – Guided Meditation

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